Confessions of a Unsuccessful Neat Freak

Our house is too big for me.

“Boo!” “Hiss!” I can practically hear you from 6000+ miles away.

Go back and re-read the first line.  I didn’t say our house was too BIG.  I said it was too big for ME.  What I mean by that is that I am out-matched and overwhelmed by its size.  More specifically, by the cubic area that I am supposed to keep clean.  (That’s right, cubic.  Apparently cleanliness doesn’t stop with the floors.)

If you read my Stylish Blogger Award post, you know that I struggle to maintain the neatness of my home due to my highly distractible nature.  What may or may not have not been clear is that I am actually quite a neat freak.  I’m just really bad at it. 

Are you confused? 

In the immortal words of Inigo Montoya, “Let me ‘splain.  No, is too long.  Let me sum up.”

The irony is that my distractibility doesn’t distract me from the mess around me.  It distracts me while I am trying to conquer the mess, thus leaving me both weary and unfulfilled.

I love neatness. I love orderliness.  I love when everything in my home is picked up.  Even better yet, when everything is actually clean in the washed-scrubbed-vacuumed way.  In fact, just thinking about it right now gave me a sense of peace. 

Then I looked up and saw the folded-but-not-yet-put-away mountains of laundry on the love seat.

Our old home was half the size of our new one.  And since I haven’t cloned myself, I’ve become 50% as effective as I used to be in keeping our space clean.  And that’s not 50% of actual cleanliness, either.

These numbers are making me dizzy.

As if neatness wasn’t already a challenge for me, I moved from a home with hardly any built-in lighting to a home where the overhead lighting rivals the sun itself.  No longer can I  pretend the house is clean when it is picked up.  Nope.  I can see every dust bunny on the floor and streak on the counter.  Unless I sit in the dark.

Don’t put it past me.  I’ve done it.  Who am I kidding?  I’m doing it right now so I can finish this post without piles of laundry staring me in the face and mocking me.

So stop booing and hissing.  Stop throwing rotten tomatoes.  I’ve got enough to do without cleaning that up, too.  If you really want to help, grab a broom and a mop and hop on the next flight over.


  1. I’m the same way! I love clean and tidy and organized, but I’m overwhelmed by the size of our house, which seemed just right before we actually came and moved our messy grimy selves into it!

  2. Cari! The photos of your home are always spotless! I can’t believe you suffer from the same thing!